


Hard(cover) (Dublin) Core (Libary) Logo

by Ophelia Coelridge (daemonluna)



Category: Hard Core Logo (1996)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Library, Gen, Humor, Libraries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-02-12
Updated: 2001-02-12
Packaged: 2017-10-14 05:34:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/145925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daemonluna/pseuds/Ophelia%20Coelridge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(4 Librarians. 3000 Periodicals. One Last Copy of AACR2.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hard(cover) (Dublin) Core (Libary) Logo

"Fuck this, I'm sick of cataloguing by hand! Why can't we out-source(2) it instead?"

"That'd be fucking selling out, Billiam. And we don't want to do that."

"This is bullshit, Joe."

"I don't fucking care, we are not joining a union catalogue(3). That's selling out, Billy. And you don't want to sell out. Do you."

"But Pipe thinks--"

"If there's one thing Pipe doesn't do, it's think. He's dumber than a book truck(4)! His lips move when he fucking shelfreads(5), William. You, me. You, me. No Pipe."

"And John--"

"John's a psycho! He thinks Melville Dewey(6) talks to him in the stacks!"

"You are such an asshole, you know that?"

"Patrons dig it. You love it."

(three days later)

"J-j-j-joe?"

"J-j-j-john. Have you been eating the fucking library paste again?"

"I-I just thought you... you should know. Billy--he's converting the card catalogue to MARC(7)."

"So, Joe, how do you feel about Billy going to work for OCLC(8)?.... Joe? Joe?"

*THUD*

"Oh my GOD, he pulled down the whole 1998 Books in Print index down on his HEAD!"

END

... it's funny... to me...

Obligatory Footnote

(1) Dublin Core: a metadata encoding standard. Basically, a set of rules for describing information sources. http://www.dublincore.org

(2) Outsource: to send catalogue records to be done by an outside (usually commercial) agency.

(3) Union catalogue: A co-operative catalogue that combines the holdings of more than one library.

(4) Book truck: y'know, one of those carts they put the books on for shelving.

(5) Shelfreading: The long and tedious process of checking the shelves and reading call numbers to make sure everything is shelved in order.

(6) Melville Dewey: creator of the Dewey Decimal System, duh.

(7) MARC: MAchine Readable Code, format used for catalogue records that is easily tranferrable between different systems. Viewed raw, full of random attacks of punctation marking fields and subfields.

(8) OCLC: Commercial database and catalogue record provider company thingie.

(9) AACR2: Anglo-American Cataloguing Rules ver. 2: great big thick cataloguing manual.


End file.
